You probably didn’t guess it, so I’ll tell you — getting pregnant! My goal of losing 100 pounds is in sight and so far I’m on track for making it before my January 1st deadline. But, if I were to get pregnant (which I was NOT trying to do) before then, my weight loss would be derailed — at least for nine months anyway!
The last few days I was really getting worried. I was 12 days late in getting my period, and although I’ve never been the queen of regularity in that regard, (and before my pregnancy often went several months or longer in between cycles) I haven’t been this many days “late” since Sarah was born. Now that I’m 40, I really didn’t want to think about having another baby. I’ve told myself over and over that if it is meant to be, I’d be thrilled and excited, just as I was when the surprise pregnancy happened a few years ago. But, now that my youngest is two, I’ve already started thinking about how much more productive I could be when she starts school!
Fortunately, I am not pregnant. Things are now flowing, shall we say, and I don’t have to break the news to my husband that this Fathers Day he gets to worry about how he feeds and clothes another kid in the family. I’m sure he’s relieved!
You know what though? After my two older kids (adopted) joined us, I was content with the composition of my family. I didn’t feel a piece was missing. When I unexpectedly became pregnant with Sarah, I was in awe of the entire experience and relished it like I’ve never relished anything else. I loved being pregnant and it was such a GIFT to experience it. I don’t necessarily want more children, but GOSH I would treasure the opportunity to experience that again and I would be equally thrilled to have another child. A part of me is actually a little sad. Isn’t that crazy?
Tags: pregnancy
I don’t think it’s crazy at all. You are a great Mom and treasure that experience!
Oh…I was getting so excited for you! Now I’m a little sad
It’s all good, I guess!
I felt the same way. We also have 3, I always wanted a BIG family, but God had other plans and it took us a while for all of them. (That and we are older) After my baby (with the an awful pregnancy) was born my Brian got the big V. Secretly, I was always a little disapointed that it worked. But last year, Brian was in a terrible accident and at one point I was in with the kids to the Dr for something else and he asked how I was doing, I mentioned that I hadn’t had a period in 3 months. He said “Are you pregnant?” I told him no that Brian was fixed. Stupid man told me that sometimes they reverse themselves. I just started crying (it made him feel awful)6 months previously I would have been thrilled, but it was just too much. I was not. It was just the stress on top of another condition. But yeah, even though I feel like my family is perfect they way it is, I always wonder “What if…”